Merry Christmas all!! If you were with me right now, I would make you a cup of coffee (or, for those of you that don’t like coffee, I would get some hot chocolate) and I would invite you to sit down with me on my couch in front of the fire and our beautifully decorated Christmas tree, so we could have a nice long talk. Anyone that knows me, knows that I love to talk!! But sadly, since I can’t possibly have you all over to my house for this wonderful evening I just described, please allow me to share what’s on my heart with you. It will almost be like we’re having a conversation. Feel free to pause and get some coffee and sip on it as you read these thoughts!!
The song “Breath of Heaven” has really really touched my heart lately. In face, I haven’t been able to listen to it once this year with out either tearing up, or crying all together. I did a lot of driving today and heard it twice, the first time I didn’t think too much about it, but the second time, I knew that it was God that had put it there for me. This song wasn’t the only reason, but I while I was driving, I had to pull over because I just needed to spend some time with God, and I was so upset that I couldn’t clearly drive. The lyrics were part of the reason that I had to pull over, but I’ll get to that in a bit. So, as I sat there in a deserted parking lot, I dwelled on this song. I don’t know what it is about this song that brings out that emotion in me. I mean, I know that it’s written about Mary, the mother of Jesus, but there are several lines in it that I feel as if were penned just for me. It feels as if the song writer knows everything that’s going on in my life right now and he reached inside my head and poured out my thoughts into something that made sense. Put words to my emotions. Please slowly read and maybe even re read and thoughtfully consider these lyrics.
~I am waiting. In a silent prayer. I am frightened, by the load I bare. In a world as cold as stone. Must I walk this path alone? Be with me now. Be with me now.
~Do you wonder, as you watch my face. If a wiser one, should have had my place? But I offer all I am, for the mercies of your plan. Help me be strong. Help me be strong.
~Breath of heaven. Hold me together. Be forever near me, Breath of Heaven. Breath of Heaven. Light in my darkness. Pour over me your Holiness. For you are Holy.
I sometimes wonder if God had wished He had chosen someone else to have my lot. Like the song said, someone wiser, someone better fitted to handle everything that has been given to me. I feel sure sometimes that there’s a better “Chelsea” out there in the world somewhere. I tend to get carried away with my thoughts, but I have to constantly remind myself that God is sovereign and knows what He is doing. As the psalmist declares in Psalm 139:1 “O LORD, you have searched me and know me!” God knows me! What a thrilling thought to dwell on! My job isn’t to sit around and tell God how he could have done things better, I AM NOT GOD; GOD IS GOD! I need to get that lesson through my silly head. God gave me the exact struggles He wanted me to have for a purpose. Although I don’t know what the purpose is right now, and don’t know if I’ll ever know; I know that I can trust him. Right now, and hopefully always, my prayer and heart’s true cry, as hard as it may be is this: But I offer all I am, for the mercy of your plan.
God that is my prayer to you right now at this moment. I sit here, in the midst of suffering, and choose to offer up all I am. As a living sacrifice to you. Though it’s not easy, and this choice is handed to you along with my tears, I give it to you anyway.
Help me be strong.
What a beautiful thing! To say “God I give up all I am, I trade in me for You” Then to ask for God’s strength. I love that, and think it’s such a glorious thing! I want to leave you with the chorus of the song. Read it and dwell on it. Remember, that God truly is the Breath of Heaven. The last line of the chorus is my prayer for you. Pour over me your Holiness. For you are Holy. Please know, that whoever you are, whoever is reading these words, I am praying for you, dear Child of the Most High King! It is a privilege to be able to share these words with you!
Breath of heaven. Hold me together. Be forever near me, Breath of Heaven. Breath of Heaven. Light in my darkness. Pour over me your Holiness. For you are Holy.